Introduction

An Ordinary Life, An Extraordinary Life: How a Third Culture Kid learned to be Okay with just Being Normal

Introduction

American sociologist David C. Pollock defines a third culture kid as, “a person who has spent a significant part of [their] developmental years outside the parents' culture. The TCK frequently builds relationships to all of the cultures, while not having full ownership in any. Although elements from each culture may be assimilated into the TCK's life experience, the sense of belonging is in relationship to others of similar background.” 1

This is me. 

I grew up travelling the world in an international missionary organization – an extraordinary life. Now I live in suburban America - an ordinary life. Ordinary is a relative term, of course. I understand how privileged I am compared with most people in the world. Yet, though I like my life, love my wife, love my kids, love our friends, love this country - it’s not the kind of life I would have necessarily chosen. Oftentimes I don’t fit in in this late-nights, party-hopping, TV-watching, braces-bewitched, multi-sports-obsessed culture.

As Pollock’s description indicates, when I’m with someone with a similar background, I come alive. There can be no end to conversation. But oftentimes, for most of the people I rub shoulders with now in my day-to-day life, I find it hard to engage.

Added to this, I am an introvert by nature. Introverts process things in their head and recharge by being alone. Extroverts are the opposite. Growing up in a community, living among a very relational church and marrying an extrovert has enriched my life but it has not been without its bumps.

On a different subject, there two kinds of films. One is the more American, plot-driven films. This is what I mostly grew up with. When I was in film school I became acquainted with the more European, character-driven style of filmmaking. It tends to be more biographical in nature. Most books tend to be plot or subject driven as well but some years ago I read Donald Miller’s Blue Like Jazz. It is autobiographical but also weaves in discussion of particular subjects into the narrative. 

I have been blessed to have led what I consider to be a very interesting life. I also have things to say. This is my attempt to meld the two. And who knows, maybe it will be a movie some day.

Some names have been changed to protect the guilty.

1.  Pollock, David C.; Van Reken, Ruth E. (2009). Third culture kids: growing up among worlds, Rev. Ed.. London: Nicholas Brealey. p. 13. ISBN 978-1857885255.